Food Matters: What I’m Learning

Part of what I love about my work as a raw foods coach is that I’m learning so much from my clients. My clients hail from different backgrounds, perspectives, and lifestyles, and so the lessons they offer me are wide-ranging and varied. As homage to them and the things they teach me, I’ll be beginning yet another series here at Choosing Raw: the “Food Matters” series. Every few weeks, I’ll share a story from my work with a particular client or clients, and how it has helped to shape my understanding of what different people need as they seek out healthier lifestyles.

This week, I’ve been inspired by a new client. We’ll call him Dan. Dan is, in many ways, a true New Yorker: busy, energetic, and goal-oriented. He wants is to lose some weight and clean up his diet, but there are certain obstacles: he works a high powered job, which involves a lot of corporate dining (and very little time in the kitchen). His hours are erratic, so it’s hard for him to plan ahead for meals or snacks. He travels a lot. He eats late at night. He likes his morning coffee. He enjoys his evening cocktail – or a few. He smokes the occasional cigarette. He’s an omnivore who enjoys everything: this means salad, but it also means meat, cheese, and the occasional fast food dinner. In short, it won’t be easy for him to implement many of the most popular and basic steps towards healthy eating: consistency, homemade meals, and planning.

Many people who approach me for coaching already eat what I consider a healthy diet, at least by mainstream standards. So my work with them typically involves fine tuning: how can raw foods be incorporated easily and more frequently throughout the day? How does one construct a raw food plan for the week? What are some fun and hassle free raw recipes that they can depend on? With clients like Dan, who come from a very mainstream place, the work is different. It usually means baby steps: small improvements that (I hope) will make a difference and kick start bigger ones.

A few days ago, Dan and I were discussing some of these improvements: lighter breakfasts, whole grains rather than processed ones, homemade vinaigrette or simple lemon and oil dressings, rather than store-bought condiments and thousand island dressing at the salad bar. He was very excited to learn about most of these. But when I suggested some of the whole grain or gluten free pasta options out there (in response to his comment that pasta is one of his favorite foods), Dan interrupted immediately. “Oh no,” he said. “I can’t do that.”

“Well,” I countered, “some of them are actually pretty tasty…”

“No. I’d rather eat raw all the time than eat the ‘healthy’ version of pasta! I have to be able to enjoy real pasta when I want pasta.”

I had two reactions to this comment. The first was sympathy: for a pasta lover, some of those whole grain brands are pretty skeevy, no matter how much I support them! The second was admiration. We’re all trying to eat as healthily as we can, but in so doing, we sometimes lose sight of our own limits. As Dan went on to explain that “real” pasta or a good steak are really important to him, I was struck by his cheerful acceptance that there are, quite simply, certain things he can’t, and won’t, change.

And that’s fine. For some people, making healthy substitutions (kamut pasta for white pasta) on a daily basis is the way to go. This prevents the feeling that a certain food is “off limits,” since a healthy version is always available. For other people—like Dan—it’s easier to eat the “real thing,” but on limited occasions. In fact, Dan doesn’t mind taking some raw “steps” that I consider very progressive for newcomers—such as eating raw till dinner—if it means he can enjoy his nights out in a big way. He’s OK with a plant-based diet almost all the time, as long as he can preserve his whole-hearted attitude towards restaurant dining, drinking, and his favorite indulgences the rest of the time. And he’s wise enough to know his own needs.

From now on, Dan and I will be focusing less on specific healthy upgrades, and more on a generally plant based diet—all the while acknowledging that Dan’s big nights out and corporate meals aren’t going to change. This may mean some pretty big changes for Dan most of the time, but it also means that he’ll be enjoying a totally authentic experience when he’s in the mood for spaghetti carbonara.

And along the way, I hope to at least persuade him to try some cashew alfredo!

I hope the lesson here is a helpful one for you: just as it’s admirable to change certain habits that aren’t ideal, it’s also admirable to be able to state honestly what you aren’t willing to change. Some people thrive on little upgrades each day, but can’t stomach dramatic changes. Others are game for big overhauls, as long as they know that they can swing the pendulum back and be totally indulgent once in a while. Knowing what you are and aren’t capable of is a huge step towards a healthy attitude, and it’s helpful to those of us who are helping you! I’m grateful to Dan for telling me what he needs, and impressed with his level of self-knowledge.

On that positive note, have a great day, all!

xo

Be Sociable, Share!

• 

Tagged as: Food matters